How to get out of survival mode.

I’m not going to lie, there are A LOT of things out there that can create stress and nervous system dysregulation. Things like the news cycle, your crappy boss, a meddling family member, or a toxic environment. And the truth is that these things DO impact how we feel but are also largely out of our control. 

Which sucks. 

Fortunately, there IS one thing that can make a massive difference in how we feel and it’s completely within our control: How we talk to ourselves. 

Often the biggest driver of stress and nervous system dysregulation is our own patterns of self-judgement, self-blame, and self-criticism. Our bodies literally can’t tell the difference between an external threat (like your shitty boss) and internal criticism. 

I see this a lot in the athletes I coach. They aren’t choking because of the weight of the barbell or the pressure of the competition, it’s because of their internal environment. And as much as we need to be self-motivated, when it turns into ongoing criticism, recovery stalls, performance plateaus, and injuries happen.

And here’s the kicker: When your internal world is hostile, your external world often matches it. Toxic jobs, critical partners, and abusive coaches start to feel normal (because they reflect what’s already happening inside).

The shift has to start internally.

Start with compassion. 

This doesn’t mean that you’re being complacent, it means that you’re recognizing that you’re human and that sometimes you’ll have the capacity to push forward, but that it’s also equally important to rest. 

✨ Start with one simple shift: be kinder and more honest with yourself today. And if you’ve been extra hard on your beautiful, human self lately? Forgive that, too.

Your inner voice sets the tone for how safe you feel in your body.

I made a Youtube video breaking down why self-judgment is probably the biggest missed source of nervous system dysregulation - and what to do about it instead.